Tag: hope

Don’t Give Up Too Soon

A Girl In A Complex World

The night is not so scary
When you know how to fly
But when your wings are broken
You start yearning for the light

Please keep waiting for the morning
Don’t give up too soon

When you’re left out in the open
You feel every drop of rain
From every storm that passes
Every hour of the day

Keep waiting for the morning
Don’t give up too soon

When it feels like you’ve fallen
To the bottom of a well
Oh, there is nothing braver
Than calling out for help

Please keep waiting
Hope is coming
Don’t give up to soon

J.J. Heller

Building A Safe Relationship

A Girl In A Complex World

Gently talking to ourselves with love and respect is hard. Especially when we’ve been conditioned to talk like its someone we hate.

The healing journey is all about rebuilding – or maybe its about building for the first time – a safe relationship with ourselves.

Spoiler alert: it takes a minute and its really awkward. 100% worth it tho!

Dr. Glenn Patrick Doyle

What Happened To Sunshine?

A Girl In A Complex World

What ever happened to Sunshine? That is what they used to call her when she was a little girl, because she giggled with the sun, as if it spoke to her in a way that only she could understand.

Butterflies, and dandelion wishes kept her busy on most days. The days before the clouds came, and hid the sun away from her.

Sunshine met darkness, and they became inseparable. She grew into a beautiful, but haunted soul; and no matter how much she gave, how much she loved, it always seemed as if storms and destruction followed her.

It made me sad to think that she knew of hell, but it made me smile to know that even hell was jealous of the fire that burned in her soul.

So, whatever happened to Sunshine, the little girl with dreams as big as her heart?

I believe she is still out there somewhere.

I miss her.

I hope that one day I will look in the mirror, and see her once again

-L.L.

Ilmusings

Choosing Life

A Girl In A Complex World

The first time I thought about taking my own life I was 14. The first time I harmed myself I was 10. This is the reality of a 20 year battle with my health and truthfully, I’m still fighting.

I’ve struggled with being different my entire life. My insecurities have pushed me so far that I lost all value of my life. Sometimes I get a glimpse of what freedom looks like without feeling the guilt and shame for being different, but that’s all it is, a glimpse. I know that being different is a part of what makes me who I am. But the struggle to actually appreciate that is definitely real.

I don’t claim to live a life free of pain and frustration or even sickness. But I have grown a lot. My heaviness now coexists with a will to fight, and the fighter in me will have the final word.

Every day that I wake up is proof that I’m still fighting. Every hour that I don’t engage in self harm as a means of coping means that I’m still fighting. Every minute that I choose to speak truth even when my mind is screaming lies is proof that I’m fighting. But also, when I have a setback, it’s yet another chance for me to fight … again.

My reality includes a list of diagnoses that include mental illness and chronic pain, AND my reality is that I’m a complex girl who is the epitome of different, who is CHOOSING life. Everyday. And I promise you, no matter what it is that breaks you, hurts you, and makes you feel like giving up – your life is worth choosing, too.

You Do You

A Girl In A Complex World

We are always striving to improve ourselves. They say that every day is another opportunity to become a better version of the person we were the day before. But personally, I don’t think that should always be case. Sometimes we just need to be here and accept things exactly how they are. To look up at the clouds, take a breath and just … be.

This is also growth, a way of rising up. Some days, just merely existing is more than enough. Just think about it. Flowers do it all the time and they make the world a more beautiful place just by being here.

So you do you! You might not feel it but the world thanks you. 🖤

The Fighter Inside Of You

A Girl In A Complex World

People don’t realize how much courage it takes to keep yourself from sinking into the dark pit of self hatred and negativity. To mentally remove yourself from a painful situation. To pick up all of your pieces from the ground, trusting that this process will eventually heal your wounds.

I know you’re feeling drained and exhausted right now, but you have to keep believing that things are going to get better.

I know you’re soul is tired, you’re mentally drained, and emotionally you feel broken, but the fact that you’re still breathing says a lot about that fighter inside of you. She’s still in there.

You’re allowed to be tired, but you must learn how to rest without giving up. You’re a work in progress and you have a future waiting for you.

So please hold on for just a little bit longer. I know you can do this!